Swimsuit Decoder: Find Out What the Bathing Suit Says About the Woman

Swim Skirt

"I hate my thighs." Although few women under the age of 60 wear swim skirts, they do pop up from time to time (thanks to companies like J.Crew that refuse to let them die). A woman wearing a swim skirt is either incredibly insecure about her bottom half or trying incredibly hard to be ironic. Whatever her reason, stay away—you don't need another chick with body issues. Unless, of course, that's your thing.