So, she dumped you. We’ve all been there. But while some guys get right back on their feet, others seem to be stuck in a tailspin for months. Well, we want you to be the guy who gets right back out there. That's why we tapped Nick Savoy, the author of the Magic Bullets Handbook and a master instructor with Love Systems, for five tips on how to bounce back fast.
1. Get it out of your system
If you’re sad, go ahead and be sad. But set a time limit. It’s much better (and your friends will hate you less) if you say you’re going to vent about your ex-girlfriend for exactly one week than making depressed your new normal.
2. Take her off the pedestal
Stop thinking you’ll never get anyone like her again. You dated her; you can date women like her. Or, hopefully, women who are even better for you. If you’re still pining, read the classic Love Systems article "Kill Beatrice."
3. Shut up about her
Once you’ve gotten her out of your system, don’t let her back in. If anyone asks about her, express a bland hope that she’s doing well and say that you’ve moved on. Otherwise, don’t bring her up. If you keep thinking of her, wear an elastic band on your wrist and snap it every time you think of her. Hey, it works.
4. Don’t lose your edge
If you stop working out, your muscles will atrophy. If you stop working your social skills, your social muscles will do the same thing. I don’t care if you’re meeting and dating women right after your breakup, but it is important to be out there being social.
5. Even if you want her back, date other women
The best way to get your ex back (if that’s what you want) is to disappear from her life for a while and come back different. Don’t worry about re-attracting her; focus on improving your skills with women in general. Hit the gym, redo your wardrobe, and read up on modern dating advice. If you have some success under your belt (ahem) by the time you run into her again, you’ll seem far more intriguing to her than if you seem like the same guy she dumped.
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