Step 4: Once you’ve made your decision, man up to accepting that it’s completely over for good. Hall says that the reason so many couples find themselves going to and fro is that they’re still feeling ambivalent about the ending. “If you’ve done all the work you can, then you must accept in your head, and your heart, that it’s over," she says.
Step 5: “Do not continue any of the fights or pettiness from the relationship,” suggests Brame. “If your partner tries to engage in negative behaviors, walk away.” Arguments are probably a big part of why you broke up in the first place—why fuel the fire you're trying to put out?
Step 6: Then, start thinking of your partner as history: Put everything in past tense, verbally and mentally. “If you want it to be over, accept that it all happened yesterday and that your life is about today and the future,” Brame says.