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Who Should Pay for a Date?

Avoid awkwardness with these three rules.

It used to be simple: The guy paid for everything. This made sense at a time when most women didn’t work, or if they did, when they didn’t make nearly as much as men.

These days, things are more confusing. Some women will be offended if you ever hesitate to take your wallet out when you’re on date. Others will be uncomfortable if you spend a lot; a woman can worry that you think that she can be bought, or that spending money means you expect her to have sex later.

Use these three simple rules to solve the "who pays" problem.

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1. Assume that you’ll be paying for most first dates...

For initial meetings, the "who pays?" problem is one to be avoided. Don’t take her anywhere overly expensive or try to use money to impress her. You’ll make most women uncomfortable, and even a gold-digger won’t sleep with you. Why should she? You’ve shown her you’ll spend money in pursuit, so she’ll want to keep that pursuit going.

When the time comes to pay, take out your wallet. Some women will fumble around their purse as if they are looking for money; ignore this. If she offers to contribute, tell her that she doesn’t have to; many times these offers are just for show. If she persists, then assume that she sincerely wants to contribute, and let her.

If paying for the first few dates creates an issue for you, choose less expensive dates instead of trying to get her to chip in for more expensive ones.

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