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Three Sure-Fire Ways to Screw Up a Relationship

Every weekend, somewhere in the world, there is a Love Systems pick-up bootcamp. Our team takes men out to bars, clubs, and coffee shops, and work on their game until they are meeting and attracting beautiful women.

We always end these bootcamps with a warning to our clients not to get into a relationship for the next three months. This must seem strange to many clients who attended the bootcamp to get the tools to get a great girlfriend. But it’s important. If you’ve raised your game and are now attracting higher-quality women, it’s like spending your life eating at fast food joints and then being asked to choose an upscale steakhouse.

More fundamentally, self-help takes time to be internalized. Without good inner game, it’s difficult to avoid the “I like her too much” mistakes that will drive a new girlfriend away. In this article, we’ll cover three ways to screw up a relationship when you’re really into your girlfriend. (So we’ll skip the stuff like taking her for granted, ignoring her, and so on.)

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1. Keep World of Warcraft to yourself, but don’t drop it completely.

You’re really into your new girlfriend and you’ve decided that she’s a keeper. To spend time with her, you’ll need to cut back somewhere else in your schedule. Fair enough. But don’t abandon who you are (per Aristotle, “We are what we repeatedly do”). Otherwise you risk no longer being the person she became attracted to in the first place.

Bring her along when you're doing some of your favorite things, if possible. Usually these will be in worlds in which you are an authority, or at least more of an authority than she is. For example, invite her to come out and watch you play a sport or tag along with you and your friends when you go to your regular spot.

And keep some of your hobbies separate. She’s probably never going to be all that interested in World of Warcraft. It’s not healthy to be together 24/7 anyway. Let her miss you sometimes. Give each other some space to grow and develop.

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