You’ve played your cards well enough that the new girl you’re dating has finally agreed to come back to your apartment after a night out. Until now, you’ve held back on making a move because you didn’t want to scare her off, but you can’t wait any longer. You want her in your bed—badly. The pressure is on to make a smooth transition from first base to home plate, but what does that entail? Music? Candles? Definitely not.
Skip any elaborate scheming and keep it simple. We asked experts for their best tips on how to consummate a new relationship—with tact. If you get it right on the first try, we promise she’ll be coming back for more.
1. Pay Attention to Nonverbal Clues
“Sometimes a guy is so anxious to sleep with a new partner that he gets caught up in the excitement. But if he wants it to be a great sexual experience for her, then he needs to read her signs,” says Dr. Jenn Berman of VH1’s Couples Therapy and host of The Love and Sex Show with Dr. Jenn on SiriusXM. “Look at how she’s responding to your moves—what makes her excited and what is she less excited about?”
2. Don’t Steal Bases
As much as you want to fast-forward to the main event, don’t underestimate the value of foreplay. “A lot of men don’t realize that biologically, women need it to get their bodies warmed up,” Berman says. “If you want her to have an orgasm, the best chance of that happening is a good 20 minutes of foreplay.”