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7 Must-Have Talks for a Healthy Sex Life

The key to a better sex life: Communication. Make sure you and your partner are on the same page when it comes to bedroom shenanigans, and you'll both feel more satisfied.

6) The Love Language Conversation

Know what acts make your partner feel loved and appreciated, whether it’s as simple as holding hands or as steamy as sending sexy text messages, and make a point to do those things is tantamount to maintaining a satisfying sexual relationship, says Berman. According to Gary Chapman’s best-selling The 5 Love Languages, people give and receive romantic love in five different ways: gifts, quality time, words of affirmation or compliments, acts of service, and physical touch. Couples with different love languages can still completely satisfy each other as long as they both communicate what makes them feel most loved. Berman suggests writing down three to five sentences that start with “I feel loved when...” and sharing them with each other. You can include everything from “when you hold my hand” or “when you initiate sex” to “when you do the laundry without being asked.” Also take notice of how your partner treats you when they’re being nice, says Berman. Do they compliment you? “We tend to love others in the way we most like to be loved,” says Berman. “But model your actions after theirs and you’ll probably be on target.”

7) The Check-in Conversation

It’s important to remember is that discussions about sex aren’t one and done. “Our wants and needs evolve and what does it for you while dating or during your first year of marriage may not hold true in ten years,” says Syrtash. In fact, the longer a couple is together, the less likely they are to accurately predict their partner’s preferences, she says. That’s why communication is key. Let each other know if your tastes are evolving.

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