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"Trust Me, I'm a ..."

How what you do effects how desirable you are to women


Film Director

The Good
Above all, a good film director is a talented multitasker with the energy and charisma of a natural-born leader. We're hoping you'll be able to perfectly coordinate the scene and mood in the bedroom. We want it all to be picture perfect, just like on film.

The Bad
We're on the lookout for hidden cameras. Don't even think about rolling on set without asking us first—especially while we're sleeping or in any state of undress. No one appreciates the untimely release of a sex tape.

What Gets Us Hot
A man who is creative and knows his way around fancy, expensive machinery is sexy. We want to play around with your gadgets and get a feel for what life looks like on the other side of the lens.

Veterinarian

The Good
Please do go all Horse Whisperer on us when it comes to that point in the night. We want to be put under the soothing spell that transfixes frightened animals and pet owners alike. Please tend to us, pet us, and be very, very gentle.

The Bad
Swine flu, dog bites, rabies. Gross! The uglier side of the profession is something we don't want to associate with getting it on. Pillow talk should not include a show-and-tell of all the battle scars you've accumulated in the past month.

What Gets Us Hot
When you come up to our place and you immediately drop to your knees to commune with our three-legged pooch or warty cat, our desire for you goes through the roof. Our pets don't just offer companionship, they also provide us with a trusted second opinion about the men in our lives.

Construction Worker

The Good
You're a man's man who spends all day working out in the sun. What's not to like? Your masculinity makes us feel all dainty and pretty when we're around you. Help us feel even girlier with flowers and compliments. And don't be afraid to get a little girly yourself. On you, a pink shirt only makes you manlier.

The Bad
As adorable as the hardhat and work attire was on our childhood Lego men, we'll be none too pleased with a guy who takes us out in the clothes he spent the day sweating through. We'll also be checking extra close (e.g. under your nails) to make sure you don't bring the grime of your day job into the bedroom. And lose the steel-toed shoes, please.

What Gets Us Hot
You are highly skilled at picking up heavy objects without even breaking a sweat. We wouldn't be opposed to being lifted and thrust against a wall every now and again. Mega bonus points for crooning about how light we are in your arms!

Professor

The Good
We like that you can go all nerdy and cerebral on us at the drop of a hat. Don't hold back on those dirty, erotic allusions to Greek mythology. Engaging us mentally as well as physically is a must.

The Bad
Some of us might not be super comfy with the fact that you spend your office hours with hot co-eds half our age. It's one thing to be excited about a student's thesis. It's another thing to gush over her! Be aware that we find those young, naive college girls to be our number one threat.

What Gets Us Hot
Your flexible schedule gives you plenty of opportunities for unexpected visits. Make use of an afternoon off to save us from our office hell. A little late afternoon tryst in the copy room never hurt anyone. Help us take the edge off. Our secretaries and minions will thank you later.

Wall Street Analyst

The Good
As much as we bemoan the fratty atmosphere, there's something so old-school and traditional about a Wall Street job. Play up the classic and hip vibe that the Wall Street mystique gives off. We are all for the suspenders, tie, and wingtips.

The Bad
Whether it's true or not, we perceive you as a sly and cunning playboy eager to rope in hot female groupies who flock to your earning potential like geese to bread. We need extra assurances that you aren't just playing us. And if you are, we don't want you pretending that you're not. Honest communication about your honorable (or dishonorable) intentions is much appreciated.

What Gets Us Hot
Have you been a naughty boy? The correct answer here would be yes. Lately your kind has been vilified in the press, and we very much adore our villains. Even if you're really just a number-crunching quant jock, you've still got the bad boy persona going for you. Work it.

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