Guys, please. Take this to heart. I am not the fittest man in the world, and I do not know everything there is to know about training and nutrition. But I know these things to be true - I do not strut around my gym, head swollen with imagined wisdom, silently judging and scowling at others as they go trudge through their routines. I, instead, accept the fact that I don't know all there is to know, and focus on doing whatever I can to get better during that day. Some of you, though, seem to be at the gym for a different reason altogether, not on some personal quest for improvement, but on a mission to be as caustic and sloppy as possible.

I've been relegated to training at an unnamed commercial facility, one of the smaller chains with overenthusiastic trainers, horny housewives and wanna-be 'roid heads. I've seen so many of you exhibit annoying, obnoxious and repulsive behavior since I started training there, that I felt it was necessary to offer you a brief manifesto, a go-to guidebook of the shit that you absolutely have to stop doing in the gym. Seriously, this stuff has to stop.

Douche behavior #1: When asked how many sets you have left, you say, "a lot," instead of asking if the person would like to work in.

I feel like I've addressed this thirty times since I joined MF a few years back. You are in hallowed ground at the gym, sharing space with men who have addressed their insecurities and worked hard to build a body that they're proud of, who have trained through challenging obstacles and overcome adversity of all kinds. You do not have the right to act arrogant about your bullshit set of cable rows. We are all in this together, gentleman. It's hard enough to get to the gym three times a week when you have a job, a life, and responsibilities. Stop making it harder by being an asshole, and just ask if we'd like to work in with you. It's what Arnold would do, and it's what you should do.

Douche behavior #2: Even with only one power rack in the whole place (I know, I've really got to find a new gym), you still set up inside it for a curls.

Never, ever do this again. Are you that lazy that picking the weights off the ground is too difficult for you? Is that how hard you're pushing yourself, that you need to rack the 55 pounds (it's never any more than that with you idiots that curl in the squat rack, anyway), total, that you're curling? Look. You're needs do not trump anyone else's in the gym. Do not ever use a piece of equipment that is meant for bigger, tougher exercises (like power racks, for squats and deadlifts) for smaller, less important exercises (like curls). Where else is someone supposed to squat? Nowhere, right? But where else can you curl? Everywhere, moron.

Douche behavior #3: Offer unsolicited, uninformed advice.

It's not that you're trying to help - if you were trying to help, it wouldn't be a big deal. We do tend to have an issue when you have no idea what you're talking about, and you tell us something stupid to make yourself feel better. I had a guy rounding his back during a set of squats with way too much weight (well over 315 lbs, which he struggled mightily with), then watch me go through my low-weight, high-rep, superset for fat-loss masochistic set, and explain to me that I should be careful and watch my knees. Dude. We don't want, or need, your Charles Atlas impression.

More to come, unless you guys can collectively seize back control of our gyms and make them safe for proper training again.