Improper assignations work best when you make her feel attended to, cherished, and spoiled. (My favorite pampered weekend: an oyster dinner in suburban Connecticut, an unremarkable hotel, and unforgettable sex; lather, rinse, repeat.)
And here’s the special sauce: If you take care of her, she’ll take care of you back. That’s the beautiful circle jerk of love. Once you make it all about her, it’s really all about you.
A dirty weekend is easy if you keep the stakes low: It exists for sex, nothing more, nothing less. That being said, do it right and the goodwill it spawns can last for weeks, even years.
You both deserve a two-day horizontal timeout right now.
So go have one, all dirty weekend long.