My sex drive is superlow in the morning, but my girlfriend’s is superhigh. What can I do to compensate in the a.m.? Also—what’s wrong with me? Lance B., Tulsa, Oklahoma
First off, there’s nothing wrong with you. Probably. It’s completely normal for guys not to want sex all the time (even if your guy friends all put on a front like they do).
In terms of increasing your morning drive, identify what type of person you are in the morning. Are you always tired and hate getting up? If so, get up 15 minutes before your girlfriend and have a cup of coffee or a light breakfast before getting back in bed, and that might do the trick. If you’re the type who wakes up anxious and needs to feel productive, then maybe taking the time to write down a quick schedule for the day will help you relax about work commitments and concentrate on sex. If you’re a clean freak or ultrasensitive to smells, then maybe jumping out of bed to brush your teeth will put you in the mood.
Finally, our sexual responses are completely habit-based. Meaning: The more you have sex in the morning, the more you’ll associate the mornings with sex, and the hornier you’ll become in the a.m.